Goodbye Co-Sleeping

There are a couple of different ways co-sleeping is defined. Some say it is when the baby sleeps with you in the bed. Others say the babe just needs to be in the room. In my mind, co-sleeping is baby in bed.

We co-slept with my son for 6 months. We have co-slept with Olivia since the day she was born. It has been awesome, and I am sure it is one of the major reasons I am surviving. It is so easy to just pop a boob in her mouth when she is hungry and doze off until she fusses at me to move away from here (she does not like to cuddle until the morning).

This morning, while sitting and eating breakfast, my husband asks me if I remembered sitting up then kissing Olivia on the head last night, waking her up. I have no memory of this what so ever.

My has been hinting the last week or so about moving Olivia out of the bed. He thinks she will sleep better. Apparently, this morning he worked up the courage to tell me the reason why Olivia is not sleeping longer than 1.5 hours is because I do things like kissing her in my sleep often.

This kind of freaks me out. Sure, it is sweet, I am giving her kisses. In the process I am disturbing her, waking her up, which in turn wakes me up. Not only does this not sound like a good cycle, but in some ways I think it may be a bid dangerous that I am doing these things in my sleep without any memory of it.

So as of tonight, Olivia will sleep in a crib. This has meant a bit of a rearrangement of our room, as there is no way I am dragging myself out of bed to go to another room (which we don't have anyways) to get her. She will probably still end up in the bed at some point in the night, but hopefully we will both get a better sleep.

I am a bit sad about this. Even though she is not a cuddler, I like co-sleeping. I like having her close. I was expecting 6 months of it. It has only been 6 weeks. However, if anything were to happen to her after knowing that I have been doing these things in my sleep, I would never forgive myself. Honestly I don't think anything would ever happen to her, but my husband showed concern, and he is also in the bed with us, and he does get a say as well. We decided together that we should at least try the crib, so we are.

We needed a crib to put her in, so this also means the older kids have a rearranged room as well. Olivia got Julius's crib. Julius now has Elisabeth's crib, which has been put into the toddler bed. Elisabeth for now, has a mattress on the floor. Yep.. this means tonight, we will have two loose toddlers in their room.

I have a feeling we may be in for a long night...